Are all these matrices separate universes of virtual reality in which workers are drugged and asleep in a post-apocalyptic world, with a virtual reconstruction of human civilisation beamed directly into their brains so the evil masters of each matrix can use their bodies as batteries? Once you start calling so many things key, of course, semantic inflation dissolves its sense almost entirely. The hopeful invocation of quality is magical speech that hopes to conjure into being something that is indefinable but definitely better than flat-out rubbishness. Jennifer L. Dorsey, PhD has coauthored, revised, and ghostwritten books in the medical, business, and personal growth categories for more than 20 years. 1. This is not a sodding game of cricket. So businesses infantilise their employees by saying they have all been on a fascinating voyage together, when in fact many of their colleagues have been brutally thrown from the bus. When even the word holiday is thought to sound too frivolous and hedonistic, so that people on their holidays set their out-of-office autoreply to announce grandly that they are instead on annual leave, then surely we have entered a hellishly self-parodic downward spiral of capitalist civilisation. When Betsy Ross presented the new American flag to him, he was supposed to have quipped: "Let's run it up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes it.". GDPR Terminology and Definitions You Should Know By gdpradmin GDPR Updates , General Information As the clock counts down to 25th May 2018 when the EU GDPR becomes enforceable, this blog post takes a look at the GDPR key definitions and terminology within the regulation that companies should familiarise themselves with: Expectations are flexible things, and people will no doubt carry on having them even if the lingo surrounding them is logically complete nonsense. It's also, frankly, a bit foolish-sounding. 4. The increasing use of conservation tillage, no-till, and cover crops is changing the way we view the soil and the environment. definitions & terminology Association of University Technology Managers (AUTM) – a nonprofit organization dedicated to bringing research to life by supporting and enhancing the global academic technology transfer profession through education, professional development, partnering and advocacy. Sometimes the made-up journey is a group affair, like a school outing. A manager who tells you to do something by end of play or by close of play – in other words, today – is trying to hypnotise you into thinking you are having fun. To call something a "problem" is utterly verboten in the office: it's bound to a) scare the horses and b), even worse, focus responsibility on the bosses. This is a truly bizarre modern way to say: "Let's talk about it later or in private." A lternate startup folder. My middle finger. Workbook vs. What do you do with a hole, especially a person-shaped one that reminds you a bit of a hastily dug grave? Perhaps you are a sad clown whose entire clown act is about lamenting the lack of bicycles in your clown life. The term memo is one that has transcended the office space. : A Treasury of Unbearable Office Jargon by Steven Poole, to be published by Sceptre at £9.99 on 31 October 2013. Delivering Quality First actually meant sacking 2,000 workers. But it is also, of course, a boon to compilers of lexicons who otherwise wouldn't have anything to put under X, so you won't hear me complaining any further about it. But this slogan was merely a cravenly euphemistic sticking-plaster for a programme of mass redundancies. AccountsActively managed fundsActuaryAdministrationAfter-hours dealingAllocation rateAlternative investment marketAnnual bonusAnnual equivalent rate (AER)Annual general meeting (AGM)Annual percentage rate (APR)AnnuityArbitrageAsset strippingAuditorsAverage (arithmetic mean)Average earnings growth, Balance of paymentsBalance sheetBank of EnglandBank of England's inflation reportBanker's draftBase rateBear marketBid-offer spreadBlack swanBlue chipBondBridging loanBritish Retail ConsortiumBrokerBudgetBuildings insuranceBull marketBusiness cycleBuy-outBuy-to-let mortgage, CAC 40 indexCarry tradeCBI industrial trendsCapital accountCapital gainCapital gains taxCapital ratios - Tier 1 and Tier 2CDOsCentral bankChapter 11 bankruptcyChartered Institute of Purchasing and SupplyChartistsChinese wallsCity of LondonCollateralCommercial paperCommodityCompetition CommissionConfederation of British Industry (CBI)Consumer Prices Index (CPI)Consumer confidenceContents insuranceCorporate raidersCorporation taxCost-push inflationCouncil taxCredit crunchCredit default swapsCredit reference agencyCurrent account, Day tradingDead cat bounceDefined benefit pensionDefined contribution pensionDeflationDemand-pull inflationDemutualisationDepressionDerivativesDiminishing returnsDiscount mortgageDividendDividend yieldDow Jones industrial average, EbitEbitdaEarnings per share (EPS)Economic growthEconomies of scaleElasticityEndowment policyEnterprise valueEquityEquity derivativesEthical investmentEuropean Bank for Reconstruction and DevelopmentEuropean Central BankExternalities, Final salary pension schemeFinancial Services AuthorityFinancial yearFiscal policyFiscal yearFixed costsFixed-rate mortgageFlexible mortgageForeign exchange (Forex)FreeholdFTSE 100 indexFTSE 250FTSE 350FTSE All-ShareFTSE SmallCapFTSE TechMARKFTSE4GoodFutures, GazumpingGazunderingGearingGiltsGlass-Steagall ActGoldGolden handcuffsGolden handshakeGolden helloGolden parachuteGolden ruleGolden shareGreenbackGrey knightGross domestic product (GDP)Gross national product (GNP)Ground rentGroup of Eight (G8)Group of Seven (G7)Guaranteed annuity rateGuarantor, Half yearHang SengHedge fundsHome reversion planHorizontal mergerHostile takeoverHouse price surveysHyperinflation, Income protection insuranceIncome statementIncome taxIndependent financial adviser (IFA)Individual savings account (Isa)Industrial outputInflationInflation measuresInheritance taxInsider tradingInstitutional investorInterest-only mortgageInterimInvestment trustInvisible handIrrational exuberance, Laissez-faireLeaseholdLeveraged buyoutLibor rateLiquid assetLloyd's of LondonLoan-to-valueLondon Stock Exchange, MacroeconomicsManaged fundManufacturing outputMarginMedianMergerMicroeconomicsMinimum wageMonetarismMonetary policy committeeMoney supplyMonopolyMortgage brokerMortgage indemnity protection/guaranteeMortgage termMutualMutual fund, Naked short-sellingNasdaqNational Economic CouncilNIESRNational debtNational insuranceNegative equityNet asset valueNew York Stock ExchangeNikkei 225Nominal interest rateNominal valuesNon-executive director, Occupational pension schemeOffice for National Statistics (ONS)Office of Fair Trading (OFT)Offshore accountOld Lady of Threadneedle StreetOligopolyOpen-market operationsOperating profit/lossOptionOrdinary residenceOrdinary shareOrganisation for Economic Cooperation and DevelopmentOrganisation of petroleum exporting countries (Opec)Overdraft, Pay As You Earn (PAYE)Percentage changePermanent interest-bearing shares (Pibs)Personal loanPoison pillPonzi schemePortfolioPoundPoverty trapPrecipice bondsPreference sharesPreliminary announcement (prelim)Premium bondsPrice to earnings ratio (PE ratio)Primary discount ratePrivatisationProducer price indexProfit and loss accountProfit Participating Deferred SharesProfitsPublic companyPurchasing Managers' Index (PMI)Purchasing power parity, Quantitative easingQuantity theory of moneyQuarterly reportQuota, RallyRandom walk theoryRate of returnRatings agenciesReal estate investment trustsReal interest rateReal valuesRecessionRegressive taxRegulatory News Service (RNS)Repayment mortgageRetail Prices Index (RPI)Retirement ageReverse takeoverRights issueRoyal Mint, Savings accountSecond-lien loanSecurities and Exchange CommissionSecuritySelf-certification mortgageSelf-invested personal pensions (Sipps)Self-select IsaSerious Fraud Office (SFO)Share indexShare optionsShareholderShort sellingSIVsSmith, AdamSoft commodities (softs)SoniaSpecial liquidity schemeSplit capital investment trustsSpot market/spot priceSquare MileStagflationStakeholder pensionsStamp duty (equities)Stamp duty (housing)Standard & Poor's 500 stock indexStockStock exchangeSub-prime loansSupply and demandSwaps, TakeoverTakeover PanelTakeover bidTangible Common Equity RatioTarp (troubled asset relief programme)Tax havenTeaser rateTerm assuranceTerminal bonusTracker fundsTrade balanceTreasuryTurnover, Underwriter (insurance)Underwriter (shares)UnemploymentUnit trustUnquoted shares, Value added tax (VAT)Variable rate mortgageVertical mergerVolumeVulture funds, Wall StreetWeighted averageWhite knightWhole-of-life policyWindfall taxWithout-profits policyWrite down, write off, Handy definitions of financial and economic jargon - from libor and quantitave easing to black swans and dead cat bounces, Chartered Institute of Purchasing and Supply, European Bank for Reconstruction and Development, Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development, Organisation of petroleum exporting countries (Opec). 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